Who are “No Matter What” Families?

What does it mean to be a "no matter what" family?

Oriana: “Many of our families are just amazing people that had. This calling inside of them to help kids.”

Jen: “No matter what she slings my way, I’m always going to love her. And I made the pledge to always love her and I meant it.”

Stephanie: “We’re in it to help change their lives and to make them better people. And so we, we decided to tough it out and keep going.”

Peg: “You know, we all need somebody in our corner. We all need somebody that loves us no matter what happens.”

Matt: “When we saw the paperwork, we weren’t sure we were equipped. I think we both knew, no matter what we were going through with this, we’re going to find a way. And just to bring him home as our son.”

Oriana: “The ‘no matter what’ families I know that are most successful celebrate their children for who they are. They’re mindful of their expectations and they go and seek help and support because, to be no matter what, I need that. I’m going to have to have self-care and I’m going to have to be driven inside to endure it, to get to joys, and to get to some of the stuff that we are hoping to get to on the other side.”

Yvonne: “Because there are days when I just want to say, ‘Damn it, I just can’t do this anymore!’ But the next day, you go back to it. Those children are still there. They’re physically hungry, but they’re hungry to, to fulfill their purpose. And you don’t stop.”

Rick: “There’s many times when we just felt like throwing our hands up and giving up on her, but we never did.”

Peg: “I’ve seen so many times where families, you know, they just get so frustrated and so upset and take it personally that they can’t give anymore. And it’s important to get help, get your cup refilled and then keep coming back and letting that kiddo know you love them, that you know that they’re worthy.”

Jermaine: “In regards to what goes on, there’s literally almost nothing you can do that’s going to change the way I feel about you. I’m going to love you regardless.”

Oriana: “I think it’s the thing most parents dance with. ‘Gee, I wish he or she wouldn’t have, but I love them unconditionally.’ And so I think the more moments that kids experience that, ‘Wow, this is something different. You know, these people are going to be here when we celebrate victories.’ Then I know that we both are connecting. And I think for the kids, they’ll say that, you know, ‘Nobody was ever in my corner. And so the first time somebody did something for me and was there for me, it meant so much.’ And if we want children to trust that, they need to know that that commitment was honored.”

Gretchen: “This was hard and this stretched us. But I’ll do it again because these children need a home and they deserve a home. And we can reach outside of ourselves and use the people that have been put around us to pour into him.”

Stephanie: “I want to deal with the good. I want to deal with the bad. But ultimately, I want to see this kid thrive. I want to see this kid become somebody. I want to see this kid heal in and become a whole person. You really are saying, ‘I’m taking this step to change a child’s life,’ because that’s what you’re doing ultimately.”

Jen: “And I would move mountains if it would make her happy.”

Oriana: “The folks who really want to make a difference in this world, when they look around and they see difficult circumstances, the ‘no matter what’ families say, ‘I’m hanging in there. I made this decision. I connected with this child. I have a connection to them. I will be there. We will be there.’”

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