What does it mean to never give up? Adoptive parents Lori and Karl share a story about bringing home their daughter, Nadia.
“We have four; two biological sons and two adopted daughters.”
“Delaney was adopted in 2002 from Kazakhstan and Nadia was adopted in 2007 from Russia. We got home back to Texas and you know everything . . . it just started. The rages started . . .”
“All hell broke loose.”
“Let’s cut to the chase. Nadia would be the sweet charming little girl that you saw in Russia, to this possessed child that would just react. So, she would take things and throw them at me, and she would pull my hair and, she was like little sparrow, but she could kick the living daylights out of you. I’d have to step back, let her rage, go into my room literally, and just say. ‘God please, give me strength to go back in there.’ And I’d be shaking like crazy.”
“It had gotten so bad. She was raging every day, Lori was getting beat up all the time, Nadia was wrecking the house, she was wrecking everything–“
“Wrecking our lives.”
“Yeah. She was just wrecking . . . wrecking everything.”
“We’ve been asked so many times, ‘Why did you adopt her? Get her on a plane. Give her back.’ We’ve had family members say that: just put her on a plane, get her a ticket, go take her back to Russia . . . It’s like, you don’t understand. She’s our daughter. ‘But how can you get beat up?’ We’re going to overcome it. We’re going to overcome it because we’re a strong faith family, we’re committed, and she’s just . . . she’s an integral part of our life. I mean, she is our daughter.
“How do we remain hopeful? Well, Nadia’s name means hope.”
“The progress that she’s made, too—“
“That that gives you hope. I mean she’s come a long way from, obviously, the Moscow days when we first got her, but, you know, now it’s just like night and day. It’s totally different now.”
“There’s always a twinkle, a little light, that you have to find to pull yourself through. Every single day, the minute little things: if she said ‘thank you,’ or when she smiled. Write those things down, because you’ll get lost without it. You’ll get totally lost—you’ll think that you’re defeated. But when you write down these moments, so that when things are really bad, and I thought that I couldn’t get through another day, I would look and the list was getting longer and longer and longer and I’m like ‘wow.’ You’re actually making progress and you’re doing a good job as a parent.
“She showed us what it means to be a mom and a dad to somebody that really doesn’t—not to give up because that’s what she had all her life, everybody gave up.”
“I think a lot of parents do give up, you know. Nowadays, even with their biological children, they give up. But that’s not something that you can do. Keep thinking that, you know, tomorrow’s another day, just another day—a new day and you just, you know, start all over again.”
“Nadia has given us hope. And there is hope for every parent out there. Never give up on hope because if you give up on hope, then there is no hope in the world and we can’t function in a world without hope.”